I have a booking at the restaurant at the end of the universe...

The Belfast Telegraph is presently struggling for advertising revenue and has decided to follow the not very wise route pioneered by The Herald and The Scotsman in Scotland and opened a comments facility on every story covered. OK, given those two newspapers’ experience, the number of loony-tunes visiting the site to hurl hatred and bigotry across cyberspace will undoubtedly rocket, but for someone who remembers the high quality of the Tele in pre-internet times, it is a sad innovation. I still get occasionally to read a dead-wood copy, but only because my mother’s obsessed with who’s recently popped their clogs and the latest news from the Sligo GAA.

But despite all that, very, very occasionally, it can still come up with a bit of the old-skool, take-the-piss class:

Since the Assembly resumed in September, five full Stormont Executive meetings have been cancelled. Assembly members are planning an almost four-week Christmas break - with the final full plenary session of the current Assembly term due on Tuesday, December 9. Will it be cancelled again?

For your chance to win a meal for two at the Stormont Hotel guess the correct date on which the Northern Ireland Executive will hold its next full meeting. To enter the compettion (sic) just fill in the form (right).
There will be three prizes of a meal for two at the Stormont Hotel, Belfast.

Heh! Heh! Time to start that pre-Xmas diet perhaps?