On 28th October Chekov, for the fifth time, asked:
"Where in the world is Lady Hermon?"
Not only had the UK's most elusive MP gone MIIA (Missing In Inaction) from the place the electors were under the naive impression they'd elected her to attend; even North Down's chief organ of record, The Spectator, had no record of her actual continuing existance on the Gold Coast full stop since a "Lady's Race" mid June.
I'm however delighted to exclusively inform you that a senior member of the oneill Clan had reported seeing someone remarkably like Lady Lucan in Bangor Post Office two weeks even before this report earlier on today. In its breathlessness and awe, it reads more like something rustled up for the coverage of a Society Wedding in the Ulster Tatler than a report of a significant cross-community event but whatever, she's back and that's the important thing.
Further extensive investigation has also revealed that since (or... because of? Surely not?) Chekov's last lament, Lady H has rediscovered her London A-Z.
Since the 2nd of November, she has attended 14(fourteen!) votes to date; all the remarkable since in the full period of this parliament up to that point she'd managed ermm... none, not even bothering to turn up for the crucial CSR debate. In the last 24 days she has submitted a total of 17 (seventeen) written questions on topics as diverse as the Bradley-Eames Inquiry and deportations from Morocco. In the two months before 28th October, she'd managed ermmm...
But I don't want to finish on a churlish note, despite a slow start, North Down looks like it has an MP once again and that's certainly good news.
After I posted this, it came to my attention, via a third party, that Lady Sylvia's attendence issues at Westminster were due to entirely legitimate reasons. While it is not my place to give further details, I'm happy to note this.
What I will say is that if journalists and those in the "political know", who do occasionally read both this and other blogs, would care to let us into the loop before we make ourselves look like uncaring idiots...then we would be grateful.
You never know, we might even be able to do you a return favour in the future.