Pass the wacky-baccy, Coulter's returned

Coulter in The Tribune this time, rather than the Irish Daily Star; the language is a bit less gung-ho soundbyte, but basically he’s spouting nonsense as per usual.

Some prime examples:

It would probably benefit all the Unionist parties to agree on a coalition of candidates for the Northern Ireland Assembly and council elections – only running the number of candidates Unionism, collectively, thought could win seats. This could be a throwback to the 1970s, when jointly-agreed candidates representing three Unionist parties won 11 of Northern Ireland’s 12 seats in the Commons. An arrangement on similar lines now might mean Protestant rule at Stormont becoming a reality in the short term, not merely remaining an aspiration for the long term

Dear God, the Prodiban and Jaffaria Law in perpetuity...I can’t think of anything more likely to get me to pack my bags and do the final runner from NI. It gets better though:

In such circumstances, it would only be a matter of time before the dream of radical Unionist right-wingers – a single Unionist party organised throughout the island of Ireland – was realised

Huh???!!!! "Radical Unionist right-wingers" as in a certain John Coulter Esq?!

Johnboy's also being hearing strange voices in his head:

That may be why there are whispers that Paisley senior could be about to stage a comeback of sorts in his beloved Free Presbyterian Church

The Free Ps are not generally known for their modern progressive thinking but even so.. re-annointing Big Ian at the age of a hundred and whatever?

Another rumour is that the secret and sinister cabal of Freemasons who drove Jeffrey Donaldson out of the UUP and into the arms of the DUP are plotting to bring him back.

And here’s me thinking it was because he was seriously pissed off with Trimble and that the Dupes at that particular moment offered a very good career move for the ultimate Unionist opportunist but instead it was a cabal of "secret and sinister" UUP Freemasons. Right.

So here’s a fine flight of fancy for Northern Ireland Unionism: Jeffrey Donaldson as First Minister; Lady Daphne Trimble as the next leader of the UUP with her husband watching her back in Westminster and North Belfast MP Nigel Dodds replacing Robinson as leader of the DUP

Keep taking the pills.

To cap it all, Coulter’s very first paragraph is wrong- I think Fianna Fail coming into Northern Irish politics is not necessarily a "reason for celebration" for even the "trad" wing of Unionists. I have said before on here that the tribalists of Sinn Fein and the incompetents of the SDLP can not deliver a "United" Ireland simply because they do not have the vision or courage to move beyond the safe sectarian boundaries and appeal to the apathetic 30% plus who might just be open to persuasion. Depending on Fianna Fail’s approach (and if I were them I’d go for a mirror image of the UK Conservatives) that middle third may just be tapped into. On the other hand, they might just opt instead for a Protestant parliament for a Protestant people operating out of (if Coulter has his way) the GPO in O’Connell Street.

Update

Curious news about Lady Trimble:

Lady Trimble has been selected by the UUP as its choice to stand against Jeffrey Donaldson in Lagan Valley at the next general election.
She is the wife of ex-UUP leader David Trimble who clashed with Mr Donaldson over power-sharing with Sinn Fein.

Although Lady Trimble was the sole candidate, she did not get unanimous backing with about 75% voting for her.