"When seagulls follow a trawler carrying fundamentalist, sanctimonious hypocrites it's because they think sardines will be thrown into the sea..."**

I detest Jeffrey Donaldson for a whole host of reasons*, but is this humble apology a first for a DUP at any level?

"The room service charges were all on the hotel bills. I submitted the hotel bills in block to the fees office," he said.

"What I should have done was separate out the cost of the room service charges. I recognise that and that was wrong and that's why I repaid the room service charges for all of the items.

"The items for rooms service charge should have been separated out from the hotel bills and I should have paid for those myself.

"It was wrong that I didn't pay for these items myself. I recognise that and that was why I repaid these items."

OK, in DUP terms (think Ian P Jr), that is the humblest of humble apologies.

This bit got me wondering though:

"I have been very clear about the nature of those films and what I was watching," he said.

"I did not at any time watch a film that was adult in nature.
"The films that I watched on pay Tv would have been films that you would have seen in the cinema.

"Unfortunately, because of my security situation at the time, my family and I can't go to the cinema, so I took the opportunity to watch some of the films at the hotel."

We’ll have to take Jeffrey’s word on that then, no smut (and if the Daily Telegraph could have nailed him on it, rather than relying on innuendo, they most certainly would have) but was there really that much of a threat in the period in question? Couldn’t he have just popped on the Columbo rainjacket and false moustache and wandered down to check out the latest Harry Potter in Leicester Square? Or sorted out a rental back home from his local Blockbuster?

Whatever, Jeffrey has -sort of- said "sorry" for getting it wrong (although rather late in the day), paid back all the room expenses and come out of the whole affair rather more honourably (again we’re talking in relative, in DUP, terms) than several of his colleagues.
Which makes his leader’s...ah..."support", less wholesome than you would have expected:

"Mr Donaldson has been asked to pay back any expenses which have not been properly incurred and I understand that he intends to do so.

"In the light of his categorical denials, Mr Donaldson is clearly entitled to a presumption of innocence. If any evidence to substantiate the allegations can be provided we would of course wish to consider it."

*Just to pick one, at random, out of the air, his support for the White Elephant Stadium backed up by his insinuation during a debate in Lisburn that the opposition to his and Poots’ pet project was based on sectarian motives: "Hallo there Mr Kettle, you’re looking especially black this evening..."

** Apologies to Eric.