You can see how desperate the efforts are. All the examples offered are slightly weird. The inescapable conclusion is that Peter Robinson is the Steve Davis of Norn Irn politics.
If we really have to have a “First Minister”, then I’d much rather it being a Steve Davis boring us all to death, than the metaphorical Hurricane Higgins peeing on plantpots and chucking his telly out the window; Brian would appear to disagree.
Is there not something eerie about the image of someone standing watching koi carp slither soundlessly through dark water?
Brian might be under the mistaken impression that all koi carp are in, the vernicular of his column, orange* bar-stewards, hence his rather unhinged remark.
I now have a confession to make. Along with millions of other reasonably normal people, I keep fish, tropical and species of a slightly cheaper variety than Peter Robinson to be sure, but still, (as far as I’m aware) nobody has thought it particularly eerie, that I take time off now and then from being a busy blogger to watch them glide (fish glide, or even swim, Bri, fish do not slither, snakes slither) through my aquarium.
It’s relaxing; at times, after another day of Northern Irish "political" news and blogging, I think it keeps me sane- or at least saner than your average Irish News columnist with the initials BF.
*Some are, the majority are a mixture of white, black, red, yellow, blue, and cream